Continued

So my husband thinks I'm weird to have felt so bull-in-the-china-shop about the party. Which made me examine my feelings a little more closely.

And all I have to say is big and strapping = good...if you are a GUY.

Girls are supposed to be dainty and feminine. I've been a strapping lumberjack of girl since I was a kid. It's not really a weight issue, although not being thin magnifies it (although now I am merely chubby instead of out and out fat due to the weight I've lost thus far).

Also, the demographics were quite unique. There was no height distribution. You were either 5' dainty and feminine...or me. Nothing much in between.

That doesn't happen so often that I've noticed and it just made the fact that I was head and shoulders over all the girls and quite a few of the men stand out that much more.

Honest, it doesn't really bother me except I just felt very awkward as a result. Compounding it, I didn't know anyone and had a hard time connecting with people who were still in their 20s, didn't have kids, and still marked a good party by how much booze they could put away (I don't drink. At all. This means I am NOT fun at parties unless you need a DD). So all of that combined into a mish-mash of not fitting in-ness.

I swear, I am NOT that tall, but I guess all the other tall girls are hiding.

I remember why I don't often go to parties now. Too introverted.