Tapering and More Food

I tapered yesterday because today is going to be a bit busy and I wanted to be through the worst of it. Went down to 7.5mg of hydrocortisone. It was okay. I had some issued with weakness and fatigue and lack of appetite, but it passed. I was able to go for a walk and did a slooooow elliptical workout for about 20 agonizing minutes.

In my new office.

Yes. New. Office. Mine.

See, house guest 2 left and, since I do produce income with writing, I feel justified taking a room over for myself. And I put our ancient elliptical in here with me so I can combine writing and exercise (assuming I have the energy for it) because sitting is so damn bad for you.

The toddler's new playroom is in the basement. Where I'll probably end up writing since it's cooler down there. I want to be cheap and not run the a/c during the day this summer. (We'll see how long I can suck the heat up.)

Here are some food pics. I'm going through a food phase. Are you shocked to hear that?

Dinner last night was a huge indulgence. One of my favorite meals. Steak. Salad. Broccoli and fresh berries.

The salad was an apple-pecan-bleu cheese medley with a homemade balsamic dressing.



A few days ago, the strawberries looked so luscious I decided to make love to them with chocolate.


And...here's a bit of a food flop. Gluten-free high protein gnocchi. They were yummy, but the first batch disintegrated in the water. I baked the rest and that was our lunch.


Now for those keeping track of my GERD (which I hope not because that's probably weird), tomatoes are a problem for me. I tried it without Nexium, but I got slammed with stomach acid and had to take some before acid started squirting out of my mouth every time I talked. Gah. What an awful feeling. Dislike!

Read More

Failure

Yesterday, my stomach realized it had been remiss in its duties to provide the free world with acid. Acid for everyone! That's my stomach's motto.

By the time I took Nexium, it didn't even work.

So I'll ask and see what the alternative medicine people say. Not too hopeful that there's anything they can do. The alternative paradigm is that heartburn is because you have too little acid or lack enzymes, but my problem has always been that I overproduce.

Then, I could not get up. Just could not wake up on Friday. I was really down for the count. I had to call for help with the toddler because I just couldn't do it.

I did not stress dose, figuring maybe if I stayed in bed all day that things might improve. I rested all day, felt semi-human by the evening.

Of course, today, same problem. I'm so fatigued, I'm fighting to stay awake. And I just don't have time for this. May is probably, literally, the busiest month of my life (and the hubby's life, it's really insane). We have three different events going today alone and I have to be able to cope. So I took 5mg.

This chest cold turned head cold is not helping. I'm at that tipping point where I'll either get better or need antibiotics. Either way, it's pure sinus pain misery.

Read More

That Didn't Take Too Long

The second I had the thought "I've been feeling pretty good, my energy is great, I want to exercise," I became congested, sneezy and tired.

Ha.

I'm going to try and out-sleep it unless it becomes a full blown cold.

The GERD is rumbling too and I don't know why--I'm eating all the same things I always do.

My knee is purple and red all over the patella. It functions fine*, but hurts like a mofo if anything touches it.

Naturally, this means the toddler now kicks, bumps and rams my knee on a regular basis. I've slammed it into a few things myself, along with the other knee. It's a curse.

If I was into tattoos I would get a bullseye.

*For walking and daily life--not going to push things with actual exercise as it can get a bit achy.

Read More

More Steroids, More Blathering

I decided to try 5mg yesterday and am convinced it was the only thing keeping me upright. Wow. Probably should've taken 10mg, given I was so tired, I was near tears when it became apparent I would not be able to rest and regroup before work.

Steroids also helped my stomach a lot. Soothing inflammation? Random adrenal quirkery? Who knows?

So far, this morning is better yet and I don't think I'll take any steroids today.

Two signs steroids were the right call: Despite steroids, I had no appetite and ate nothing, not due to the GERD as my stomach had improved at that point, but adrenal appetite suppression. This is what makes me think 10mg would've been a better dose, but, you know me, I'm the reluctant druggie.

Two, my sense of smell was insane. I wanted to claw my nose off my face. OMG.

The hubby used hand sanitizer and I made him leave the room. He washed his hands and I still could smell it from two rooms away so I napped with the blanket over my head. Except, the scent of my deodorant made me want to shave my armpits with a vegetable peeler just to get the smell off me. Then this lavender scent thing I bought for the bathroom began bothering me (and I love lavender!) so I put it in plastic, shoved it in the linen closet under a bunch of towels and I could still smell it through the door. I had to hold my breath and give it to the hubby with instructions to get it out of the house. I hear our garbage can smells awesome now.

The first 5mg dose and I no longer entertained a second career as a drug sniffing dog.

I called my GI doc only to find they have disappeared. So now I have no GI doc and rapidly escalating GERD. They took my stomach polyp and ran. Ha. I can't make this stuff up.

The secretary flat out told me insurance won't approve Nexium twice a day. So I begged for just 10-15 extra pills I can take on the bad days to be prescribed by some physician I've never seen. Meaning, nothing will probably happen. I did make an appointment with someone else sometime later this year, which is the 'earliest' appointment. Ha ha ha. I can't stop laughing sardonically.

The longer I'm a patient, the less impressed I am with specialty care. The pulmonologist only sees me when I'm well, they're way too over booked to absorb me into the schedule when I'm sick, so the ER actually provides primary care for acute asthma. Same deal with the GI doc. If anything goes wrong, they aren't available and it falls to the ER or possibly my primary care doc to try and muddle through. Crazy.

I'm becoming more and more a fan of a good family doctor.

(No I'm not going to the ER for stupid GERD, I'm just making the point that specialists fall short in their care coverage. A lot. I'm baffled as to why this is the predominant care model because from what I can see, it's a lot of money and it doesn't work so well for acute problems.)

Read More

Recovering

So I took 5 mg yesterday, after it took me four hours to marshal my energy to get ready for a long anticipated lunch date that I probably should've cancelled, and then after coming home and just crashing into bed, unable to rouse myself even though the hubby had left and I was in charge of the toddler.

Okay, that was a long sentence. It's making me twitch, but I'm just going to apologize and move on. I am not editing that sucker.

Anyway, I break out the steroids if I'm too whacked to parent. Being unable to wake up fully counts as whacked, especially when I'm the only parent in the house.

I also took extra Nexium (which is not good because now I'm shorting myself and may have to go without meds later) and four Advil.

Oh, and I started the next pill pack.

Between the four, something had to help, right?

The abdominal pain began to ease after that--it wasn't just my stomach, but the entire gut. I never achieved a state approaching anything near having energy, but I could get out of bed.

Today the stomach is better, although it's trying to go into acid overdrive after breakfast. I'm hoping I can just mind-over-matter it into submission.

I'm beyond trigger foods at this point, it's now to where I can't eat anything safely. Even though I'm not hungry, I have this drive to put something in my stomach under the misguided notion it will help. Peppermint tea is soothing. Ice cream (Breyer's low carb) feels fantastic and it's a trick my parent with Barrett's has used a lot over the years.

Pepto bismal does jack. I hate Pepto. Every doctor tells me to take it. I don't think they quite understand the nuclear waste properties of my stomach acid. By the time Nexium fails, Pepto just makes me want to throw up, it's like using an eyedropper to put out a bonfire.

Some of this was adrenal, but I'm not sure what the car order was on the Train of Pain. I think GERD was the engine, then tack on the drop in cortisol from the pill pack ending, the tenuous grasp of my HPA axis on reality, cramps, and the hot, overly busy week preceding the whole mess. Something was just seriously off in my body.

For today, I'm debating 5mg. My gut is not twisted in knots, but the fatigue is more than I would like. As in, if I laid down, not sure I would get back up. We'll see.

Read More

Which Came First?

I think things are so rough right now because the pill pack ended and my body is not happy about the hormonal change. It hasn't hit me so hard in quite a while and I'm not sure what's driving it now.

So last night, I had an 'acid attack' also known as GERD gone wild. Or maybe it was the adrenal bit driving the GERD bit. I don't know, but doesn't it seem like every few weeks I'm dealing with nausea and stomach pain? There's a pattern there, just not sure how to interpret it.

Of course, being ill all night means today is not so great. I can't eat. I'm tired. Not feeling hot at all.

At least I didn't throw up, which seemed like a victory at the time. This morning, it feels quite hollow.

Someone asked about Marfan re: the toddler. You know, Abraham Lincoln had Marfan's. He was also quite depressed. This article from The Atlantic is amazing to read.

My great uncle had Marfan's, but he married into the family, so it's not in the bloodline. All this to say I know a teeny bit about Marfan's and she doesn't have the physical markers for it.

There are a lot of tall kids out here, it's the Eastern European genetic stock. They grow them big behind the former Iron Curtain and they come to the US and get bigger. How big is big? When I visited the husband's homeland, I was delighted to find shoe stores display the size 10 model, not the size 5 as we do in the US. (I wear a size 9-10.)

Having traveled to his hometown by way of Paris--where I was a gargantuan American towering over everyone and didn't even bother to try and shop for clothing there--it was like finding my people. The tall and the wide with fantastic Italian leather shoes in MY SIZE FOR ONCE.

Back in the states, the toddler has peers who are taller than her (they are always of Eastern European descent). I also work in the elementary school on occasion and wow, we have tall kids here. Gaggles of them. I think we should make our own growth charts to use because surely there's more than an average amount of kids off the charts for height.

Don't get me wrong, the toddler continues to be taller than most and there aren't a ton of kids her age who match her height, but she's not totally alone either. The motor stuff is just her though, I don't know of any peers having the same issue, but it's not Marfan's either.

I was clumsy, but not until later in childhood. I also had terrible penmanship, but never anything that crossed the line into needing therapy. I wouldn't have called myself coordinated until my 20s (although I had good ability in martial arts in my preteen years, I just couldn't walk without tripping and breaking a bone). Sometimes I think she just got a quadruple dose of all my faults.

Read More

Black Friday

Spent Friday doc hopping.

GI follow up to learn the polyp was a fundic polyp likely from GERD med use. Which is pretty much what the internet told me (and yes, I know, I was whigging out good about the growths, the growths of doom! So sue me.)

No signs of Barrett's, which is great news. Doc says science isn't sure if GERD meds prevent Barrett's or not, but, comparing my experience with my parent--20 years of nothing vs. 20 years of GERD meds--I have to say the meds seem to be winning.

If I get brave, I can have the surgery to tighten the sphincter if I want extra insulation from Barrett's. Which sounds like a nice idea, but I'll hold off until the adrenal demons are done with me.

Oh, and no more scopes. The post-op nurse must've been reading someone else's file because I do not need a colonoscopy. Or any endoscopies in the near future. Just lots and lots of Nexium and I'm good.

Then off for the ankle x-ray. When I woke up Friday morning, I could not put any weight on it for several hours. Between alternating doses of Motrin and Tylenol, plus a wrap and a shoe, I was able to put more weight on it, but not walk. Eventually the joint went numb which was a blessing.

Xrays didn't show a break, but I was put in an air cast because of the sprain. That has actually been very helpful. I didn't realize how much help just stabilizing the joint would be. You would not even guess that I had seriously considered picking up some crutches at one point, that's how great the air cast is. I even stumped around Target for a bit because I forgot it was Black Friday (thankfully, it was later and everyone had already been trampled to death). Hopefully it will heal quickly.

By the way, did you know they sell air casts to just anyone at drugstores? I could've saved myself a lot of time and money if I'd known that! Instead I took the two hour route to a prescription for one, which I didn't even need!

Note to self: Check the drugstores before the doctor's office next time.

Oh and if you want to make a doctor laugh, wrap your ace bandage too tight over your Santa socks so that your whole foot is covered with imprints of Santa.

Energy wise, Friday was the best day yet. A little tired but definitely 80% good and only 20% tired. I'll take it! Eating was finally more normal. Took only 15mg. Serious thumbs up.

I really think the family drama on Tday was pulling me down as Thursday was horrid. Really horrid.

And no, I didn't find the ankle stressful at all. I'm sure physically it was, but I had no emotional whig out about it. Broken bones that don't break skin do not worry me. At all. I've broken this particular ankle twice before, once doing almost exactly what happened on Tday. Plus I broke a rib and my arm twice.

Yes, I am a walking disaster.

The point is, breaks hurt, but they are not life or death. Sometimes there's nothing they can do anyway. Like with the rib.

I also remember the time the toddler put her hand in the car door as I was slamming it shut. The door latched around her fingers. I gave her a hug, checked her fingers and took her to lunch as planned while calling the doc to set up the x-rays. The mommy friends with us were horrified and I think they thought it was weird that I didn't freak out.

Do you know some of them avoided me after that incident? Look, she needed to eat if we were going to spend hours getting x-rays. Eating also distracted her from the pain, plus she got a happy meal toy, which, same thing. And, no I will not be running in circled and flapping my hands like a decapitated chicken. That doesn't help the toddler. Medical care was delayed like an hour. Oh the horror! Call CPS!

So that's how I handle suspected broken bones. Unless my femur is in pieces sticking out of my leg with copious amounts of blood, it is a non-event.

Maybe someday this adrenal unpleasantness with be a non-event too.

Except, I still flip out about blood. Not so much mine, but the toddler's. Gasping in horror and everything. I know it's not serious, but my baby bleeding makes me go DEFCON 5. So there may be no hope for me.

Read More

Between Asthma and Gerd (gastroesophageal reflux disease)

There are several theories put forward about the relationship of gerd and asthma include: Stimulation at esofagolaringeal reflex, reflex of the distal esophagus stimulates the vagal reflexes that cause bronchoconstriction (reflux theory). Another mechanism is reflux esfagobrokhial; acid from the esophagus could stimulate acid sensitive receptors in the upper respiratory tract, causing bronchospasm.

Gastroesophageal reflux was found in 45-89% of patients with asthma, this may be caused by esophageal reflux, refluksesfagopulmoner and the smooth muscle relaxant that is betha adrenergic group, aminophylline, inhibitr phosphodiesterase causing Esophageal LES incompetence. The clinical presentation of gerd is a sour taste in the mouth, heartburn, and disfagi. If the substance of the pharynx and mouth reflux will cause laryngitis, hoarseness and aspiration pneumonia, pulmonary fibrosis and chronic asthma.

The researchers still disagree about the treatment of gerd can reduce the dose of the treatment of asthma and improve lung physiology. The goal of treatment is to treat asthma and gerd esfageal while reducing reflux and protects esophageal mucosa. Asthma and gerd should be treated together to avoid more serious complications.

Read More

Twilight Fiasco

The endoscopy ran into some complications.

Namely that I am not a good candidate for Twilight anesthesia.

Their words, not mine.

I have a vague memory of choking and a flurry of activity, but I did not wake up.

Unfortunately, I didn't have to be awake to be a problem.

I was restless. Fighting the scope. Clawing at my mouth.

They gave me more Demerol. More Versed (sp?). Enough Benadryl to knock out Godzilla and I still fought.

After 45 minutes (for a 10 minute procedure) they gave up.

I am now the weenie patient who needs a surgical consult for whatever is the next level of anesthesia after twilight.

Sheesh.

Read More

Lots and Lots

Okay, busy busy here. Ready?

Take a deep breath. Here we go.

1. Visited 2 preschools. One is the perfect fit (I think) with a gentle director whose done the PT/OT hamster wheel with their kid due to muscle issues. The other is the perfect schedule, fit unknown, but slightly better facility and a good Pre-K program for next year. Gah. How to choose? I hate this part.

2. Did my favorite work out. Ran 400 stairs and walked something more than a mile. Calves were sore for 2 days. I will try for 600 stairs next time. Trying to figure out when to stop? At 1000?

3.Also did some interval running/walking/skipping/hopping. No soreness after that.

4.Had an adrenal moment after that stressful Friday. It wasn't bad, but I was foggy for the whole next day and just run down. Didn't 'wake up' until the day after.

5. Aviva suggested I look at endometriosis (sp?), but I would not think I fit the profile. No painful periods. BUT I did have that laproscopic (sp?) surgery for appendicitis that wasn't appendicitis and I wonder if there's scar tissue from that. There is a palpable difference in tissue quality RUQ vs. LUQ and even appearance. The RUQ is bigger. I have wondered if it's scar tissue.

6.Forgot to ask the gastro on how to handle breakthrough symptoms at night as well as the possibility that it's the GERD meds that are the problem. Also, forgot to ask for refills. Doh! That's how stressed I was that day, stressed into disorganization. Also I ran 6 flights of stairs to make it to the appointment and was still out of breath when they called me back. Really frazzled that day.

7. I seem to have now lost 3 pant sizes, depending on cut and fit. This is the exact same size that no one has in stock. Which is bad because the pants I have on now? Kept on by prayer alone.

One more size 'til goal.

On top, I've dropped one size and I can't quantify beyond that. The goal is just to be something smaller than the current size.

When I was bikini skinny? I wore anything from an 8 to a 16, depending on cut (the curse of being tall with broad shoulders). At goal, the top size will probably waffle between the next two sizes down at. My ass, I can get into one size, the rest not so much.

8. The salad ebook in the right side bar? Hit #4 on Amazon's Kindle top sellers list. Note this is not a competitive category. I think someone could return the book and I'd probably shoot to #1. Still, kind of nice.

Also, one of my slow cooker recipes was selected for a recipe newsletter. No pay, but publicity.

I'm still waiting to hear from the editor on the novella. They are a few days past the deadline they gave me which grrrrr.

9.The asthma no likey the humidity. I've had to use the rescue inhaler. Sigh.

Read More

Gastro Appt

Super wiped right now. Stressful day. Hour and a half at ped doing the annual check up, which was draining for a variety of reasons. Then a mad dash home to get the toddler set up with a sitter and off to the gastro.

The deal is, I have pain but no relevant test results. There should be no pain. It's frustrating. I am on board with the idea that there's nothing wrong, but my body does not care and persists with this RUQ pain.

I will have an endoscopy with ultrasound. The GI Doc worded it very delicately and was super polite, but I gather that I was just too fat for the RUQ ultrasound they did earlier, so we'll do another one.

Ultrasounds must not be very sensitive because I ain't that fat no more. Or maybe my lard is just impenetrable.

I don't have IBS. There are no issues on the exit end, but I was prescribed an IBS anti-spasmodic anyway. I probably won't take it because the issue for me is not the pain, but that there is pain at all. I can mostly live with the pain so long as the GERD is controlled.

But there shouldn't be pain. Or heaviness.

My spidey sense feels strongly that there is something not right, but I have no idea what to do when the endoscopy and ultrasound come back normal. Push for a colonoscopy? Look at the ovarian cyst in there (although how it would make my gallbladder jerk like it was in a mosh pit, I don't know)?

Both the PCP and GI docs mentioned something about a surgical consult, which confuses me. Don't you see a surgeon to cut something out or is there some diagnostic angle that I am unaware of? Will they be able to find what the tests have missed?

What do surgeons do with patients with no diagnosis? Randomly remove organs?

I am in no hurry to have any surgery. I haven't even been off steroids for 2 months. If it's not an emergency, I'd rather just wait. My main concern is to be sure I'm safe, that this pain is not indicative of a serious pathology. It is so specific and chronic, it's hard to accept test results saying everything is fine.

Read More

HIDA Scan Results

Ejection Fraction: 62%

The fact it took 2 hours for the contrast to enter my bowel? A non specific finding that occurs in approximately 20% of patients and merits further investigation with a Right Upper Quadrant ultrasound to rule out a bowel obstruction.

H. Pylori Test: Negative.

Liver Blood Work: Normal (which I am SO relieved to hear as the fatty liver thing worries me).


Number of phone calls it took to learn this? 6 back and forth over 3 business days.

Amount of time on hold with the doctor's office for the last call? Long enough to complete a work out.

So why does it hurt so much? I can live with pain, up to a point. The past month or so started to cross the line for me, especially with the GERD flaming high. It's hard to believe that level of pain is completely benign.

I also would be shocked if there's a bowel obstruction, everything seems to be moving along just fine in there.

Next steps will be the ultrasound, which will show nothing. Then the GI appointment and, if necessary, the PCP has offered a surgical consult to see about having the gallbladder yanked anyway.

On the one hand, I am relieved that there is no need to rush to surgery, especially with the HPA axis being so mercurial. On the other, I'm frustrated by this body that hurts for no good reason. Even less fun, I believe the test results put me in a category where even if I have the gallbladder removed it may not alleviate the pain.

Sigh.

At least now when I'm up at night due to the pain, I can do so with confidence that there is nothing wrong.

Read More

With a Little Help from My Pills

Took 5mg steroids today because...

-exhausted
-weak
-no appetite for the last several days (ate only one meal yesterday and am forcing myself to eat)
-loopy
-BP trending low but not bottoming out per se, just feels like it is
-irritable
-muscle cramps
-HIDA scan was way stressful

Other possible solutions to explore include...

-Tinkering with BP med dose or discontinuing altogether
-Putting more carbs in low carb
-Staying far, far away from medical procedures of any kind
-Never seeing doctors again because they order said medical procedures
-Stop complaining about anything because that means I see doctors who order said medical procedures

Still can't say yet if the 5mg helped but I'm waiting for it to kick in aaaaany second now.

I also hit my head harder than anyone should this morning, which is known as NOT HELPING. We have a small house and the concession we made to have a dining room, (teeny) family room and (tiny) play room on the first floor was that we shoved our bed in the dormer nook upstairs, which has a vicious widow's peak.

Yes, we sleep in a hallway that occasionally attacks our skulls.

Note to self: Never jump out of bed.

The HIDA scan results are in. Just waiting for the doc to review them and call me back. Still time to place your bets. Yay or nay on gallbladder removal? Since I seem to specialize in symptoms that don't test well, I say nay. Also, I have learned that GERD meds totally jack up the gallbladder.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to self medicate with chocolate and then take something for my aching head.

Read More

HIDA Scan That Would Not End

Thank goodness I have someone visiting who can just up and toddler sit for 5 hours because the two hour HIDA scan? Went on and on and on.

My gallbladder wouldn't dump the radioactive dye. They had me walk. And walk. Jump up and down. Go to the cafeteria and sniff food in the hopes of prompting the gallbladder to empty. I got in a full 30 minute workout trying to get that stuff to move.

Two hours later, it finally started to empty. Emphasis on started. They went back and forth trying to decide if the dye had really moved into my small intestine or not. The doctor said no. So I had to walk some more. Then three nuclear techs hemmed and hawed over the films (video?) and, finally, everyone agreed it had moved.

So they did the CCK thing so they could measure the gallbladder ejection fraction. For something that was previously so sluggish, it did manage to contract and move stuff along with the CCK.

I was released four hours later only to return because I bled through the band aid and all over my shirt. Of course I wore a nice shirt. Which is now ruined.

While it is not normal for the dye to take 2 hours to clear the gallbladder, that doesn't mean the HIDA scan is abnormal.

Place your bets. Will the HIDA scan show the gallbladder has to go? Or is it just a GERD gut motility thing?

I bet the HIDA scan will be normal. I think it's probably a gut motility issue.

On the upside, the test reproduced the appendicitis symptoms so now I know I feel that way when the gallbladder isn't emptying like it should.

Read More

The Latest

I am tired today. Had a nice weekend. Worked out twice. Once on the elliptical, then went for a lovely walk. Saw lots of deer and deer babies up close and personal. Then my blood sugar crashed and I dragged myself around the rest of the weekend managing to get the groceries bought and keep the toddler entertained.

A hard core X-rated makeout session with some butter toffee helped. (Turns out grocery shopping + low blood sugar = toffee in the grocery cart.)

Today it was hard to get out of bed and get up. I'm still not feeling awake and it's almost 1pm. It could just be a toffee hangover.

I will go early to the endo appt later this week and get an am cortisol draw just to be safe ( I think I mentioned this, no?). Hopefully this is just a natural adjustment period after having been on steroids for so long.

I do recall that ending the steroids during past HPA axis suppressions did not necessarily correlate with feeling 100%. It took about a year the last time for me to feel human again.

Saw the PCP today and had some blood work (testing liver and ruling out h.pylori). We are scheduling a HIDA scan and I will be seeing a GI doc. Which I should have done much sooner, but it is very difficult to properly care for such a malfunctioning body. I feel like I'm trying to plug holes in the dam wall and I've run out of fingers.

You can only go to the doctor so much, you know? I can't keep up with all that needs to be done. I think if I did everything I was supposed to, I could probably see doctors continuously which...ugh not the lifestyle I'm going for.

My sincere hope is to be free of all but the most basic medical maintenance, but I fear I will never know what it is to live without some kind of medical constraint again.

Read More

Gut Stunts

So I called the doctor about the GERD and diffuse abdominal pain that has been haunting me since Thanksgiving.

And their staff couldn't seem to grasp what I wanted.

1. Better medication for the short term.

2. GI referral for the long term. Time to get scoped and imaged out the wazoo.

I sense I confused them.

"What have you been doing to deal with it?" they asked me, I suspect trying to wrap their minds around how someone can walk around with a complaint for so long.

All I can say is they must have better experiences with health care than I do. Also, I know there are no gallstones and ultrasound imaging was normal as of early 2010. I'm weird like that. Paying attention and sh*t.

If they knew precisely how long I've dealt with this pain, off and on, they'd probably hang up on me. This has been going on since I was in my 20s, only just becoming daily in the past year. Ignoring it is a pretty ingrained habit at this point.

It was not until the GERD blew up in conjunction with intensifying pain that I paid attention.

GERD I can't ignore. It is pretty much the worst pain I have ever known. Worse than labor (lots of things are worse than labor FYI, like the stomach flu, seriously). Because of GERD, I understand why people kill themselves due to pain.

If every day of my life was GERD on a rampage? I don't know if I could do it.

Prior to GERD meds, my parent had many ER trips for stomach pain. They vomited daily. They couldn't sleep and now they are pre-cancerous. Prilosec etc... came to late for them.

Medication has worked for me for 16 years.

Why has it stopped?

More importantly, is there any way we can get to where eating chocolate is not an act worthy of Evil Knievel?

Right now things are slightly better, but there are a lot of rules I have to follow to hold it all together. It's time to figure out what is going on.

Read More